Riding my Bike

Tonight I just got home from a 43 mile bike ride. I started with the intent of just riding 30 miles but as I was riding I just started thinking about stuff and I just kept on riding. I started at about 1700hrs and returned home at about 2000hrs respectively. When I got home I felt like passing out or throwing up but I did neither. I just soaked in the tub and took a shower.
As I was riding I was so over come with grieve that I just could not stand it and although I was exhausted I pedaled harder tell my legs started to cramp but I just kept going. All I really wanted was to see my sweetheart, Lorena.
Earlier this week Wednesday to be precise my battalion conducted a change of command ceremony. That was one of the most depressing days that I have had in a long time. All I could think of was my change of command about a year ago when my sweetheart was in the hospital. Later that day I found myself talking with the Lord while looking at a picture of him kneeling in the Garden of Gethsemane praying to Father, and I found myself asking why my Lorena had to go through so much pain and why did she have to die.
I know the Plan of Salvation and I know that this life is a test and that if we endure the pains and trials of this life walking in obedience to the commandments of the GOD following the example of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ then all will be well and the blessing of eternity will be ours but it is so painful to walk this road without my sweetheart. I miss her.
Last week I went to see her grave. I just just set and talked with her and expressed my love for her and how much I missed her.

Thanks to Winns for checking my mail while I was gone for the last three or so weeks. I had gone to San Antonio, Texas for some training and then I went to Utah to see Lorena's grave. Also thanks to Ruby who watch my dog, Rocky. I have been dating Ruby for the last 4 months. She is the one who listens to me and cheers me up when I'm feeling down. She also goes on hikes and kayak trips with me.

In a previous entry I asked for help in raising money for an event to help Soldiers suffering from PTSD and I would like to just ask again to help me by sponsoring me in this event.
It is a 200 mile bike ride from Tampa Bay to Jacksonville Florida. It is called Ride2Recovery. The website is www.ride2recovery.com. click sponsor a rider and type in my name Johnny Wilson and make a donation. I'm doing the ride because I like biking and I'm a stessed out soldier trying to deal with the trama of looseing my sweetheart to cancer. So, please help me and sponsor me with a $25 or more donation.
Thanks

Johnny Wilson